Day 16

Well I should definitely be doing homework right now, but I’m sure with my procrastination and night owl ways, I’ll get it done just fine. I’m in the midst of applying for LdM volunteer activities and if all goes through, I will be overjoyed to get out into the Florentine community and give back to the city that’s already given me so much. It will also be nice to get away from tourism and abroad students and fully immerse and challenge myself. I had my photography class again. I’m in love. Big surprise…but today we finally started using our cameras and learning the basics. It’s kind of difficult and I don’t really know what I’m doing but I just know I love it. We had an hour and a half to walk through Florence and work on our first assignment and I ended up spending an extra hour taking pictures. I spent time in just a small area too. It really does give me a new perspective and a new way to look at life. We have to have a theme to our projects and as of now I think I’m going to do something with bikes. I don’t think I’ll ever look at bikes the same again. The varying styles, colors, age, position, the grease on the chains, I could go on and on. They’re everywhere too…part of the reason I took pictures an extended amount of time…but I’m excited to go back out after looking at what I shot today. So much more to learn. Can’t wait.

Taylor posted in our WIB Facebook group an article, Why Millennial Women Do Not Want to Lead http://www.forbes.com/sites/deniserestauri/2012/07/16/why-millennial-women-do-not-want-to-lead/. It really stood out to me and struck home a bit. I’m spending these 111 days trying to learn about myself, challenge myself, and grow. But there have been times (and part of my learning about myself) where I’ve held myself back, subconsciously trying to be “perfect”. I’m always against that because there’s no such thing as perfect. Who defines it? But it is so much of our culture. And also trying to do it all or have it all. The Italian lifestyle definitely has made me slow down and appreciate the subtle things in life but my hurried, trying to do all I can, tend to creep into my thoughts at times. I’m still in need of taking a deeper look into myself and be more honest than I ever have been. Something I always strive to do but still I know there’s stuff I’m avoiding. I’m using such vague words as “stuff” and “things” because I don’t know what all it is yet. Or I guess I do. When am I going to take that look? Maybe that’s half the reason I go on my lone adventures. I keep setting myself up to do it but hasn’t happened yet. Again, I still have time, but I feel it’s coming soon. I like my alone time, even if it’s just to soak in all the stimulus that surrounds me. It almost is a constant battle though. I like my alone time but I also love to be around my new found friends and continue to get to know my roommates. I guess there is the balance which I feel like I have for the most part. I really don’t know what’s to come but I’m okay with that. It makes life that more exciting.

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