Day 30

Who am I creating myself to be? The lovely Taylor Smith emailed me the quote, “life isn’t about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself.” It’s interesting because I came to Florence hoping to find myself a bit more, but I think I’ve already had a pretty good grasp on who I am. Rather, it’s been much more learning about myself and I guess creating some version of myself too. But I want that version to be me and not some Florentine version. Yes I have grown and I know I will continue to grow. A lot has happened in these 30 days. And I know that will only continue. My growing might even take a rapid spike up. I guess only time will tell. I think I need to stop searching for something and just let it be. Whatever needs to come my way, will. I still trust that with all my heart. I just need to let go and let god. How many times have I said that? It’s not as easy as it seems but I know it’s what I need to do. Maybe I’ll even find a church and take a little prayer escape.

This no computer thing is killing me but then I just try and remind myself that I was lucky to even have a computer to begin with. Yoga was again more relaxing than I could have ever imagined. In the end, my whole body was perfectly still and I think asleep but my mind alert. Such a strange sensation but again came out so rejuvinated. I’ll get there. I know I will. Onward.

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